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 Saturday Night at The RAFA
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Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Hey! It's Saturday night at the RAFA Club and we're going to Chatham to celebrate Jess and Chloe's joint birthday party! Its been a while since I've been to Chavam. But I'll tell you fuckers something for nothing, this shithole is now going well upmarket and is beginning to look decidedly trendy. In the docks area anyway, which just happens to be home to the waterside RAFA Club. 
Well, we've been a bit short of rehearsal time recently due to holiday jobs, Mexico etc, but managed to get sorted with a set list and a run through on Friday before the gig on Saturday. Ok, so we borrow Mr Nibbles brother's Astra van, stick the three guitar amps in it and head down to Chatham. We get there and Jess and Chloe are already on the job doing a group balloon blowing session (lucky balloons, I'd say!) . But yours truly has to return to HQ to pick up Mr Nibbles who has been working on the Sinatra matinee show (selling programmes - not singing duhbrain!) at the London Palladium. So its then back to Chatham where the party is rocking along to Side FX very competently playing a selection of covers including Purple Haze and Sweet Child of Mine. This is followed by Security Warning. They are cool. I am not going to say anymore 'cos I'd probably be arrested! Just check out their fuckin' website! Next was Kobrakai with Glen, Chris, Dan and Caz playing their deep and dirty shit. Everytime I see that good lookin' fuckin' muvverfuckin' hunk along with with his short-arse fucker lucifer acolytes, they get better and meaner. Ok, I'm not a natural metal fan, but I'm getting into their deepest shit deeper and deeper. A great show guyz n'gal! Just keep da fuckin with da heads! - Rock on! Especially you, dudette!!!!! Yeah?! I mean YOU, sweetie!!!! Talking of fucked heads! It ain't no metal! It ain't no fuckin techno! It ain't no pussy-whipped indie! Its Eleven Days Ago! The Brit-Shit Alternative!! And what is that? I hear you say. This is the EDA stuff, which combines old skool indie pop rock (Poor Little English Boy), rock (Still Believe), anthemic pop served up with indie chords on a bed of metal chorus (Feed Me All the Time), 3 rythym guitars hitting the same chords fast, hard and tight, like you're being bullett-fucked (Presents for Xmas), alt/metal xtreme sports E-Head song (Jump - Get Higher), Punk (Killer in Town) and a scally rap with anthemic pop chorus and lead guitar (I Never Knew). Ok, we all know that these days, rock n' roll ain't like it used to be. Thats because all the industry nancies and management pussies who sign bands want goody-two-shoes, politically correct, obedient little toy musicians who have read the health & safety pamphlet and are not going to do drink or drugs. But isn't that the point? How can you really make decent rock n' roll unless you are an angst-ridden misfit fuck-head? Love him or hate him, Pete Doherty will always be remembered. Why??? You fuckin' tell me!!! .... one thing I will tell you is that Pete's music will forever outlast The Dirty Pretty Things. Anyone getting my drift? Got an opinion? Speak here. And so to The Beautifully Decayed. Do you like chick bands? I fuckin' do! There is nothing hornier than a sexy chick bass player! Especially ones with a dirty pretty little smile and who know how to use it! Especially ones who jump all over the stage waving their hungry little butts around! Especially when you see them in a chick band that is really enjoying it all so much. Well this was Jess and Chloe's party and Chloe is the bass player in the BD's, so I was paying special attention to the proceedings and was intrigued when Jess was invited up to help out on a song called "Black Tongue" which is a cover of a Yeah, Yeah, Yeahs song. Laura and Jess looked liked like they were having a lot of intimate fun. And so was I, watching 'em! Anyway, their set featured original songs including the brilliant "Is it me or is it you?" and ended with a Blondie cover "one way or another" which appeared to provoke the mainly girly crowd into a psuedo lezzy frenzy! So what are the BD's really about? Good times and girly lezzy fun! Am I up for it....yeah, you bet!!!!! Should you be up for it....yeah, you bet!!!!! And that was that, it was home for a smoke, an early night and some rather pleasant images floating round my semi-conscious! Just as well really....cuz I'd forgotten to take me happy snapper! love from
Darren (ex-chav)
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If you go down to the woods today......
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Monday, August 14, 2006
Last week, I saw an offer to do a little festival gig on the T Wells Forum message board. Being inquisitive, I followed it up and the band ended up with an invitation to play at GocStock. It was a private invitation festival. From the info we got, it seemed that this was a three day event in the woods (druggage, x-country booze-up and then a jump-off!! You know the form!!!) and we were to do a late afternoon spot before the whole shebang wound up yesterday evening.    
 Well, after travelling miles down some very obscure country lanes somewhere in Kent and despite the van being shat on by a very alluring Jersey heffa as Asbo was trying to milk her formidable teats, we arrived at a clearing where a load of prestige (excuse me?) motors were parked up. We headed down a path into the woods passing a tent village on the right to another clearing where a stage had been set up. And there we met the legendary Goc of GocStock! Wow! This lady was so cool! It was all I could do to hold off goin' through my "jumpin' jack flash" routine! Ok, after pulling myself together, we got sorted in between the showers of rain and as we started the set, mysterious figures wearing strange hats began to arrive out of the mist until we had before us a fine crowd of peeps who were some of the hippest dudes we have ever played to. You know what I mean!??!!!!!!! I certainly know what I mean!! These guys had been at it for three days, 24/7! Talk about the "raving" dead comin' alive! We'd have to admit that in some respects the set was a bit shambolic, what with microphones falling over in the mud and stuff! But no one seemed to mind and we absolutely loved doing that set! So we were done and the London band, DIALOG headlined to bring the festival to a close. I don't know what these dudes run on, but whatever it is, we should all use some! What a line-up! What a show! Not a single weak link! The creatively dynamic rythym section never misses a beat and is tighter than Darren's arse during a night-time stroll on Clapham Common! The guitar juxtaposes cool with gut-wrenching emotion and the singers combine sexiness and fun for everyone with style, confidence and aplomb. Yeah, this band makes you feel good in the wood! Hey, it feels like we made some new friends! Hope this happens again! Thanks, Goc! You Rock!! (Geddit??!!!) Darren xxx
(Editors Note: lay off the cheesy jokes, Darren, you are NOT at all funny)
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Asbo Slaps The Big Nosed Rasta Man For Charity!
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Monday, August 07, 2006
Can you believe it??!!?? I'd just got off the nest on Saturday morning, had a dump and a shave (who r u tryin'to kid??) pulled on me burberry and went downstairs for a cuppa and a read of the paper. And there it was on Page 9! No, it wasn't Page 3! It was on Page 9! Soft lights, Moroccan cushions ............Britain's first ever Masturbate-a-thon!  Masturbate-a-thon logo: started off in the US. Photograph: copyright CSC 2000 Well, I've always been up for for a bit of group therapy, but this was taking things too far, especially if like me you are somewhat challenged in the weiner department! A bit more reading confirmed that this was an American initiative (about as shit as their foreign policy initiatives, if you ask me) imported to the UK to promote safe sex and it was sponsored by heavy-weight charities like Marie Stopes and the Terence Higgins Trust. And fuck me rigid! The Masturbate-a-Thon was gonna be filmed for TV!! So here I was, cuppa in hand, slack-jawed and barely woken up, being propositioned to come for a good cause! I'm a public spirited geeza and I'd have loved to have helped out. But the reservoirs were a bit low as I'd already spent the best part of a dawn raid blowing me tanks off! (Darren, who r u tryin' to kid??) So I got on the bone to Asbo and said; "Hey Asbo, dude, how ya doin'?" Asbo said he was lying in his pit just debating whether to fry up a bacon sandwich or ring his ding-a-ling. I said; "No! wait! don't touch it! Get washed, scrubbed and get your little pink arse up to HQ, Hasta Pronto! Asbo!! I'm gonna get you on the telly and maybe we'll get a little publicity for the band! And its for a good cause!" So Asbo arrives at HQ and we get him prepped for the challenge complete with sponsorship form. We give him more pre-takeoff checks than a jumbo jet and by the time we've finished, everything is in A1 working order and he is gleeming! We tell him; "Asbo, remember just three things! You gotta go for the record! All you gotta do is keep going for eight hours thirty-five minutes to beat that american tosser! And when they interview you for TV, don't forget to MENTION THE BAND!" Well, he's back now, but he looks a bit pale! He's not saying much! We'll just have to wait and see if the TV dudes at Channel 4 decide to broadcast his noble efforts. Looks like he raised £15 for charity! Good on yer, Asbo!! Darren
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This ain't no fuckin' techno!!
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Wednesday, July 26, 2006
We didn't need our knuckledusters in the end. Nobody got their head kicked in. And we wern't even threatened! Except for a certain someone demanding that Mr Nibbles identify yours truly! The Fans Choice at the Tunbridge Wells Forum last Saturday, turned out to be the biggest gig the band has been involved in so far. And the longest day. And the longest night. Picked up the 17 seat rental minibus from Aveley Self Drive at Biggin Hill at 10am. This is a cool place to hire from (£95 all in) and they don't treat you like a piece of shit. Generally you will be dealt with by an easy going geezer who looks a bit like a spliff-friendly Catweazle. Then its back to HQ for a final run through of the set and a quick trip to Primark in Bromley for some black shirts for the gig. It's a funny thing, but Asbo is a surprisingly sharp dresser with an eye for detail. He's always moaning that the rest of the boys just arn't up to scratch when it comes to dressing up the band. He accuses Mr Nibbles of looking like a "fuckin' hippy" on stage. And it's a real effort to get Ronnie (plays the hi-hat with his middle leg) to wear anything at all. But I reckon that Lil' Andy looked cool in his all black outfit complete with white satin kipper tie! So that afternoon the boys set off for The Forum to get kit, soundchecks etc organised. Meanwhile, the rest of us get the minibus ready (load it with a couple of crates of Fosters!) for the fans to make the trip later on. Its about 5.30pm when we do the pick ups in Bromley, including numero uno fan Graham who has brought along Emma, who does "something in the City" on their first date! Jude, has turned up, Chloe, Jess, Amy and loads of her mates, Tom and "Newt" are all aboard as we drink and chug our way down to T Wells. The gig kicks off and we're on second and EDA play one of their best sets ever. In fact all the bands play really well in front of a really good crowd and the heat and sweat adds to the atmosphere. Local band, Zoe from London bring the most punters and win the night, which was a very fair result. At the end of the evening, Mr Nibbles invites a load of peeps back to HQ for an after show party. Suddenly, we have a few more new fans crawl out the woodwork! Anyway we've picked some more alcohol from Nobles in T Wells and head back in an assortment of cars. The party goes on all night until well past dawn. At one point, I head down to the swimming pool area and I see four naked people cavorting in the pool including two females! Wow! This is so rock 'n roll!! There are actually totally naked women in the pool!!!! And I'm looking at 'em!!. I'm just about to strip off and join in the fun, shouting excitedly "it's so cool to get naked!", when one of them says "Er, well no, actually... we have our underwear on." But its too late! My boxers are round my ankles, and I can now see the white bra's and thongs clearly. Bollox!! Embarassed, I pull up my boxers and head back for a fresh beer! I'm strangely aroused..... its dawn, supplies have run out and there were some people lyin' around totally wasted!  Next thing I know, it's 9.30am, it's stinking hot and looking out the front window I see a dude with a ginger pony-tail asleep in the boot of his car..... xxxx
until the next time!
Darren
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Jimmy Carr takes the "piss" in Tunbridge Wells !
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Saturday, July 15, 2006
More message board mayhem! Is it worth posting anything at all! LOL! We posted a link to our latest demo a few days ago on the TW Forum messageboards and all the usual imbeciles start bleating like a flock of "Dolly" clones! Well, we would have to admit that with all hate posts we get on that board, we knew it would wind them up! But you'd think that they had the intelligence to just shut up and ignore it. Not a bit of it! They fall for it hook, line and sinker! First of all, "L", the self-appointed Tunbridge Wells "Queen of Taste", Adam Ant impersonator and front-wooohman of a local goth band pompously declares:- "I think this song is one of the most tasteless things I have ever heard". And then they all start! But, because most of them are so pre-occupied with their own infantile insecurities, all they can say is stuff like "shit" & "crap"! Not one of them backs it up with a proper opinion. And the silly little bitch drops herself right in it! Cos', meanwhile, one of her mates, "B", is making tasteless jokes on another thread about the holocaust to promote his own lyrically brilliant (according to him) band . Bleedin' hypocrites! What was it that Jimmy Carr said during a gig at the Assembly Halls the other night? "Royal fu**ing Tunbridge wells' the most middle fu**ing class place on middle earth". If these toss-pots carried on like this in the North of England they'd get eaten for breakfast! As it happens, I reckon some of those hairy-bollocked bands from the North wouldn't mind munching on some gothic muffin for brekkers! Don't bother accusing me of leaving a bad taste in your mouth, honey!! I'm just a deposit and run dude! Anyway we gotta play a gig at their local venue in a week's time despite threats by "B" to impale us with his "cock and take a banging shit" on our faces. There's a rumour going round he has a swastika tattooed on his tortured testicles!! If there's a big punch-up, we're not bovva'd - wot wiv our "ready to embrace" louis vitton chavvy suitcase stuffed with axes and chainsaws! see ya - Viva the Brit-Shit Alternative, evict the rich and ban the DNA database! Darren (message from mummy: Darren! Have you forgotten to take your ritalin? You naughty boy!)
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Tonight - Thurs 18th New Cross Inn - GIG CANCELLED
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Thursday, May 18, 2006
Cancelled 18/05/06 9:00PM - Free Entry Project Mayhem at The New Cross Inn Eleven Days Agothe eSKAlators
The New Cross Inn, 323 New Cross Road, New Cross London SE14 6AS (map)
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Stable Round 2 Update
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Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Eleven Days Ago played their second round Stable show last night and guess what?.... They came 2nd! Congratulations to Contra Las Aras (winners) and Stowaway Sterling for providing top entertainment in front of a very decent crowd for a Monday night. And thanks is due to EDA supporters again for coming along for the second time within a month and helping the band to move into 3rd position on the 2nd Round leaderboard. The show itself provided an interesting and provocative contrast of musical styles from all the bands. Eleven Days Ago kicked off the proceedings with their new lead guitarist, Andy Payne, catching ears and eyes, with some very nifty fretwork (and footwork). A particular feature was his very poignant solo work on the band's newly recorded "Feed me all the Time (Make Love)". In a foreshortened set, the band bounced through it's repertoire with its usual panache and the ebullient Mr Sherren's enthusiasm for entertaining seeming to be undiminished despite having been under the cosh from some of the Forum's regulars recently. It was also good to welcome the return of Matt Lee on bass (after a three month sabatical catching up with schoolwork) and the re-introduction of his bass solo in the hook-laden "Still Believe". The next band on was Stowaway Sterling, a band which is underrated in the opinion of this reviewer. Why, I hear you sceptics ask? It's because they have the ability to write songs with great observational detail. Not in an Artic Monkeys way, but in a way that reflects where they come from and what THEY experience. No, they don't hang around in inner city alleyways posing as minstrels of the socially dispossessed. What they do is to inform us with humour and irony about a world that looks outward to something more global. Ray Davies made his point in his own parish. These boys, although still very young, appear to be attempting to say something about a more global parish. And its hardly surprising. Its forty years later and the world has shrunk. Musically, I would counsel as much rehearsal as possible, but there is considerable potential for these euro-indie rockers to interest a wider audience. The final set came from the night's winners Contra Las Aras and provided a very fitting finale to the evening. Although quite static, the band commands a significant stage prescence and the soaring keyboards are very ably complemented by a rock solid rythym section which suggests that this is a band that has intelligently applied itself to developing a very digestable overall sound. Lack of familiarity with the music, (a little more info on the website would be helpful) prevents the reviewer from understanding what it's all about yet, however, its initial appeal does encourage further curiousity and investigation and first impressions suggest that their music could promote in the listener an euphoric "closed-eyes" experience whilst enjoying some cake and contemporary tobacco. Bye for now! keep it moist! the "ole hippy" 
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The Forum, Tunbridge Wells - Monday 20th March
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Monday, March 20, 2006
This gig is the second round of the Stable competition. After winning the first round, we are now hoping to get enough votes to go into the final which is scheduled for a September Saturday. So if you like what we do, please come down as every vote counts. We are playing with two very interesting bands - Contra Las Aras and Stowaway Sterling. The Contras are a very enigmatic band who we understand live in the woods...with "bears, wolves, snakes and cheddar...". Whatever, they impressed at the Forum recently when supporting Veldt. And Stowaway, who we know from the last round are nice, quiet people who write very witty songs with sensitive Euro/Gallic references....very hip, very modern.
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A result at the Beacon Court Tavern, Gillingham!
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Thursday, March 09, 2006
Two days after Scott unexpectedly resigned from the Band, we had to play a BOTB at the Beacon Court Tavern in Gillingham. So we limped down to the venue from Bromley, a bit battered and worried that we would not be able to put on a good show. The line up was basically our rythym section and lead vocals as we had to adjust to the lack of Scott's lead guitar and backing vocals. We played an adjusted set which had been hurriedly put together that afternoon and were relieved, that, at least, we had not completely screwed up. The two other bands playing were Back to the Drawing Board and Touchcore. At the end of the evening, the judging panel consisting of two sound engineers and the venue owner voted EDA, the night's winners! We were gobsmacked! The next round is sheduled for Saturday 22nd April.
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Thanks
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Friday, February 24, 2006
Thanks to everyone who came to support us and the other bands at the Tunbridge Wells Forum on Monday in our first round Stable Show. Because of you, we have gone straight to the top of the leaderboard. There are pics and a short video clip from the gig. Now we have to do it again on the 20th March to get into the Finals scheduled for September. It would be a tremendous achievement for a band just 9 months old and is a very small step up the slippery pole. Hope you will come again... and a few more! A word about the Forum itself. The venue is under threat and needs as many people to go to gigs there as regularly as possible. So please do what u can, even if its just telling people about it. As for the gig itself, all three bands played to a packed crowd up for dancing, moshing and crowd surfing. If you like beautiful girl-fronted prog rock with sequencers, make-up and a very dandy bass player, then go and watch Imperium on the 27th March. On the other hand, if your idea of a good time is indie alt rock, fronted by a nice young chap who kinda looks like a Formula 1 driver playing a post Monaco party gig, then Stowaway Sterling are the ones for you. You can next see them on the same night as EDA, the 20th March at 8pm. As for us, well, we've got mad, bad Jackie boy...nuff said... eh?!
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SoundHole Gig this Saturday 4th February
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Monday, January 30, 2006
We're back at the ever popular SoundHole, High Halstow near Rochester this Saturday. The bassist is unavailable, so we have a line-up change for the night. Andi will be on bass and Jack plays guitar for the first time since Upton last summer. SOLD OUT
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2 FREE tickets for THE KOOKs - Tunbridge Wells Forum Saturday 28
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Wednesday, January 18, 2006
Competiton We have a couple of spare free tickets for The Kooks + the Automatic + Raineater on Saturday 28th January. You will need to do a review of one or all of our songs. Best unbiased review gets the tickets - Good Luck! For the rules and instructions - click here
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The Garage - 28th December - Gig Review
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Wednesday, January 04, 2006
28th December 2005 at The Garage - Coma + Hiatus + Clam + Super-Gyration + Eleven Days Ago – Promoter: Fallen Promotions
Anyone visiting the Garage these days should be aware of two things. You must bring photo ID and you must appear to be sober. If you fail either of these tests, the greasy little clinker chomper on the door will not let you in. Period. That’s it – you’re fucked. A few Eleven Days Ago fans discovered this despite making an extreme journey from Kent to support the indie rockers. But, singer Jack, saved the day when he let Chris and Julius in the back door just as the set began, allowing the boys to enjoy the gig from the wings of the stage. EDA kicked off the gig with their latest song “Poor Little English Boy” - a contemporary song about suicidal teenagers in the new millennium. As always the band held the attention of the crowd with their strong stage presence right through the set list which included "You Run, I Hide", "Moving Water", "Still Believe", "Up Above" and finished with the seasonal “Presents for Xmas”. Next on, was Super-Gyration, an excellent young band with more than their fair share of charisma. Their set carried the crowd along with some superb guitar riffing underpinned by a tight rhythm section and finished with “Project A”, which had the singer smashing all kinds of hell out of the crash cymbal. Their drummer reckons the Super-Gs should only drink during performance and not before! A politically correct rock ’n roll drummer? God fucking help us! Jon Bonham must be turning in his grave. Clam followed Super-G and played a very accomplished set which included covers by Queens of the Stone Age and Weezer. They also played to the biggest crowd of the night who were definitely enjoying themselves. Hiatus took the stage – perhaps it wasn’t their best night – although there was one very strong song (could someone let me know), which is worth seeing the band for on it’s own. That left Coma to finish the night off with their own brand of eclectic Muse/Radiohead influenced song wizardry. It’s clever inspiring stuff. However, this reviewer reckons that to really appreciate this genre… you need a field, a festival, a bosom for a pillow and a plentiful supply of whatever takes your fancy!! Bye for now and keep it moist! The “Ole Hippy”
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Website
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Thursday, June 09, 2005
Website goes live At 10:40am today our website went live. So this is the beginning of the band. We have been rehearsing for our first ever gig at The Loaded Dog in East London. How did we get the gig? We just asked if we could play! We wanted a gig well away from Bromley, 'cos being our first attempt, if we fucked up, nobody local would know about it! Bernie is the new landlord and he has taken a lot on trust! All we have do is get some other bands to play with us. Well we didn't know any bands, so we went down to The New Cross Inn where we saw the D:Models, a chick-fronted electro rock band. We just asked them if they wanted to play the Loaded Dog with us. They said there were up for it and then we asked Kobrakai and 9-Volt (two bands from Kent) and they were also up for it. We don't have a fucking clue what we are doing - but hey! We have our first gig! We have got a few songs, Still Believe, Up Above, You Run - I Hide, Moving Water, Presents 4 Xmas and covers of Anarchy in The Uk and N.I.B. We now have a bass player! Matt Lee, 16. Matt lives on Bromley Common (home to many a feral chav) and goes to school at Ravenswood. He is the reason how we got our name. He joined the band eleven days ago!
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